Whilst trying my best not to moan to anybody, I've actually managed to silently implode.
Now I have a war going on inside my head that not even the closest people to me, know anything about.
I feel so frustrated & stressed, at such a dead-end & trapped.
I wish I could just disappear. I don't think it would make a difference to many people.
The annoying thing is that whilst I am writing this. I am overly aware of how many "I's" and "me's" are being written. It makes me feel so self absorbed, whiny & selfish. I start thinking "who the hell are you and why do you feel you have the right to moan?!"
Why does my brain do that to itself?! Why do I listen to everybody's problems over and over, no matter how minuscule & stupid & try to help everybody out, yet I don't listen to my own body when I'm hurting?
That's not right...
I feel like my world is crumbling around me, I can't explain to anybody why I feel like it and nobody understands.
If people don't understand, they try to tell you how you feel or make it about them...
On second thoughts, maybe there's a reason I don't tell anybody how I feel.
I have a day off work tomorrow that will probably consist of sleeping, food and television. Maybe I'll turn my phone off, other people's whining won't be my problem. Work won't be my problem.
Well... Chin up eh...
No comments:
Post a Comment